If we don’t change, we don’t grow. If we don’t grow, we are not really living.

It’s been a long time coming, but I REALLY am going to start writing again. Why? Because it’s all happening! I am finally going to be on the move again. I’m going to be with myself and my brain so I’ll have to let those thoughts out somewhere.

Flights are booked and plans are starting to be made.

In August, I will be going to northern Italy to au pair for 4 weeks with a family with two little girls, hang around the countryside and pick up a little Italian language and cooking skills! It’s a small town called Sant’Orsola, near Trento.

Then after that, I’ll be jumping on a plane for South Korea. I nearly went a few years ago but it wasn’t the right time… Now it really feels like it’s now or never. I’ve been fortunate to be getting lots of support from other adoptees and local Koreans via Couchsurfing (best network ever) and other friends that have spent some time out there. Seoul will be my first destination, where I will do an intensive Korean language course with some extra cultural classes on the side. I hope to be able to get involved in a few different things over the course of a few months. Then after that, we shall see! More travels through other parts of Korea, I’ve been scoping out a few other volunteer projects in other countries in Southeast Asia, and now with the latest of earthquakes in Nepal, I’m going to be keeping an eye out for when there’s something available for general volunteers to get involved.

I am really excited. Teaching in Vitoria for the last 5 years has helped me save up the funds again, given me stability for a while after the irregularities in South America, but it’s not time for me to be settled yet (is it ever gonna be time?) I’m sure I will have more reflective things to say about my time here when the end gets a wee bit closer, but for now I’m just appreciating the fact that you start to be more grateful for all the little things when you know it’s coming to an end. My mind is already out of the daily grind of routine and repetitiveness, the weeks are getting easier and easier (spring weather helps) and I’m remembering all the good times more clearly. Instead of feeling trapped and slightly suffocated (melodramatic, I know), I finally feel more free here to really take advantage of these last few months and do everything that has been put off. I don’t feel like I’m fighting to make it work, make it be a place to stay forever, because I don’t have to. Maybe I’ll come back eventually, you never know, but for now I’ve got my sights set on new places, new people, and new beginnings! (Cheese!!!) Back to the big picture again.

But really, I think sometimes you spend so much time in a place and a routine that it starts to get under your skin. How much of you is you and how much of it is the environment, the circumstances, and social pressures that get to you, whether it is said aloud or not? I can clearly see different sides of myself from different stages and places – life in the U.S., in South America, and here. I’m sure the next chapter will be full of change and growth too. I’m planning a timeline of at least a year, depending how long I can stretch the funds or what kind of work I find and want to do.

For a while I’ve been feeling a bit lost but maybe that’s the key… you have to get lost to get on track again. Yea I’m pretty sure everyone else has discovered this and it must be the lesson in various novels. On that note, I’ve been reading again too. And I recommend the following:

Euphoria by Lily King
When the Rivers Run Dry by Fred Pearce
Wild by Cheryl Strayed

Mmmm brain food. Time for real food now. More to come.

 

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